There is only one Tree Hill

I just finished watching One Tree Hill. There are 187 episodes and it took me a little less than a month to finish it. I spent pretty much all of my free time binge watching it. From the very first episode I fell completely in love with this show. This show showed me that no matter how many obstacles are thrown your way, you can still make it out of it, that people can change for the better. I learned that friends and family are all you need to be happy, and to make sure you surround yourself with the best of them. Love means giving chances when there’s no more chances left to give.   Your art matters. Life is too short, so make the most of it. People always leave..but sometimes they come back. You have to “stand up for what you believe in. The truth matters so tell it” . Believe in YOURSELF. Believe in MAGIC. Believe in LOVE, because it does conquer all.  Know that no matter how much your hurting, it will always get better. “What you do matters. And how you do it matters.” You’re stronger than you know, you just have to remember to believe it.  And of of course Don’t be anyone else. Be yourself.

“I don’t want to be
Anything other than what I’ve been trying to be lately
All I have to do
Is think of me and I have peace of mind
I’m tired of looking ’round rooms
Wondering what I’ve got to do
Or who I’m supposed to be
I don’t want to be anything other than me”- Gavin Degraw

“It’s the oldest story in the world. One day you’re 17 and planning for someday. And then quietly and without you ever really noticing, someday is today. And then someday is yesterday. And this is your life.” –Nathan Scott

“We spend so much time wanting, pursuing, wishing. But ambition is good. Chasing things with integrity is good. Dreaming.”–Haley James Scott

“If you had a friend you knew you’d never see again, what would you say? If you could do one last thing for someone you love, what would it be? Say it, do it, don’t wait. Nothing lasts forever.”–Brooke Davis

“Make a wish and place it in your heart. Anything you want. Everything you want.”– Mouth

“Do you have it? Good. Now believe it can come true.”-Millie

“You never know where the next miracle’s gonna come from.”–Quinn

“The next memory. The next smile. The next wish come true.”–Clay

“But if you believe that it’s right around the corner.”–Chase

“And you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it. To the certainty of it.” –Chris Keller

“You might just get the thing you’re wishing for.”–Skills

“The world is full of magic. You just have to believe in it.”–Julian

“So make your wish. Do you have it?”–Brooke Davis

“Good. Now believe in it.”–Nathan Scott

“With all your heart.”–Haley James Scott

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Just 3 more weeks

Its funny how after being away from school for a mere week just makes you not want to do anything. I went home tired and ready to sleep, maybe  be productive and do some homework, and I come back well slept and ready to be lazy. It sucks though because I have to do all this studying and get ready for finals, when now more than ever I just want to be home with my family relaxing. Trying to just gotta keep telling myself that I have only three more weeks left. Three more weeks until I can entire my coma and sleep and have no obligations towards school, and life will be great… It’ll be Christmas after all.

How “Crushes” work

The other day I was sitting with a friend talking about the people we’ve had crushes on. After a few pictures were shown he showed me how “Crushes Work”. He pointed to my blanket and said this first dot it someone who has a crush on me(the dot above it). I am crushing on the dot above me, and that dot is crushing on the dot above it. I thought about it, and it made sense to me. We tend to crush on people who like someone else or just simply doesn’t see us that way.  Its kinda sad when you think about it, we’re playing a sort of twisted game of connect the dots, that never fully comes to a close. I guess that’s what dating is, falling in like with someone until eventually someone likes us back.

Next step

Its time I started changing my life around. Do the things I want to do. And not be afraid of what those around me think. I need to be my own person, it’s the only way to be happy.

I’ve recently graduated high school, in other words that means no more being childish and just mosying around. I need to start taking action and do things. And this time I will.

This blog will start to become more about my life as I transition from bring considered a child into adulthood, as well as life in college. Growing up is life, so I might as well document it.  If there is anything in particular you would like for me to comment on, and write about  it in the comments below!

Happy summer!! #lovewins

People need people

People need people. There’s no changing that fact. Though some need people more than others, it all just depends on who you are. So when you decided to make a bond with someone it’s not just for fun, it’s because you really and truly need that person, and that person becomes your person. The one you go to when you can’t find yourself, when you need to be hugged, or just need to laugh. Your person is the one you call at 3 in the morning saying you killed someone and they’d come over and help you bury the body no questions asked. This kind of relationship doesn’t just build overnight, but it can be broken. Part of being someone’s person is knowing when you have to just let them go so they can move on to bigger and better parts of their life. Even though it’s killing you inside and you just want to hold on to them and never let them go, you let them grow and become all they can be, even if it means growing apart from you. When you think about it and take your own perspective out of it, it seems like a meaningless harmless thing to do, grow apart, but the second it happens to you its like your world is falling apart. And there is nothing to hold onto, because the thing you once held on to, looks nothing like you remembered.

Two, four, six

After two years

you’ve built a pretty good friendship

you’re close with them

though there are still doubts, and a little judgement

But the potential is greater

 

After four years

you’ve built great bonds

growing stronger and stronger each day

these people have been there for a good chunk of your live

trust is almost sealed

happiness and acceptance are strong

 

After six years

you’ve found an everlasting friendship

you know them inside and out

they’ve been there for almost all of your life

There is no judgment

They’re family now

Or so you think

 

One thing can change everything you’ve built

all the walls you put up come tearing down

with just one thing

all the happiness gone

and you’re left wondering

when did we all change

and how do we get back to the way it was

When is it time to let go?

When is time to let go of something? At what point do we say enough is enough and move on? When we’re slowly falling apart? When there is more pain then there is happiness? When you never smile? When you’re constantly wanting things to get better?

Letting go seems to be one of the hardest things for me to do.. And I know is not just me its something everyone struggles with.. I’ve read so many stories and watched so many movies where the person keeps wanting to hold on to something and all its doing is slowly tearing them apart.. piece by piece. They generally end the same way.. something or someone comes out of no where and rescues them. Helps them get to where they need to be. But what if you’ve waited and waited for that person to save you? Cause I’ve been waiting for almost years no..Guess what I’ve got? That’s right. Nothing

I used to be known as the girl who was always smiling. I was always told that my smile brighten people’s days.. but that smile.. its been missing in action for a while.. and to be honest… I don’t think its coming back..

All I want is to be able to move on. I just want to know how to move on.. not look back …